It is a pretty good rule in life to take total responsibility for your own achievements and failures. What other people do affects you, but you are the one in charge. Life is a project and you are the manager. So you can't blame others- it is all down to you.
But while that is a healthy and productive attitude I do find that from time to time I go too far the other way and give people I work with and for too much latitude. If you are working long hours for an ungrateful boss it is your fault for putting up with it - but that doesn't mean you accept it, just that you don't waste time blaming him. If you are being let down by incompetent co-workers then that is something you need to address. You can't let taking responsibility become an excuse for what others are doing that lets you down.
This is true in spades when you are self employed. One of your first questions when picking up a new client is whether or not you should let them into your life in the first place. Here are five attributes of really terrible clients. I am a bit sore on this point at the moment because my medium term plans are currently in shreds because of a difficult client. I am working to get shot of her as soon as possible, but in the meantime it is a good chance to review the five attributes of clients to be avoided.
First off, they pay late. This is bad for cashflow, obviously. But it also means you expend time and effort in chasing money that you could be devoting to more valuable projects.
They aren't happy about paying for things and are always looking for cost savings. This again is a huge drain on your brainpower. Even if you have enough control of your ego not to take it personally, having to justify expenditure is a waste of the valuable resource that is your brain.
They are disorganised and slow to respond to queries. This makes them hard work to interact with. A project that is fresh in your mind is much easier to act on than one that stretches out over time and forces you to keep notes and refer to them.
They are not well informed. This obliges you to spend a lot of time explaining things that are obvious.
Those four are all easy to spot early on. The fifth one takes a while to manifest itself and is more subtle. Some clients use emotional manipulation to get you to do things. "I have lost sales because of this delay" is an obvious one. "I placed this order a month ago and I can't do anything" is another.
Dealing with these kinds of clients takes firmness. If you have acquired one, first of all get rid of them as soon as possible. While doing so be extremely firm. Send them a reminder as soon as a payment isn't made on time. Chase them for responses when you need them. Refer them to publicly available information rather than give them a free training programme. Above all, don't get sucked into a personal relationship. You are selling them a service, not getting married to them.
photo credit: Man in a strange clown costume via photopin (license)
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