The trouble with people is they have needs.  If you are going to have people in your life you are going to have to take that into account.  I might have regarded a bank holiday in early spring while the days are getting longer and things are getting warmer as the perfect time to get some work done at organising my priorities and doing a bit of much needed spring cleaning.  However other members of my family had other ideas.  They contrived to have me driving around the country and sitting in living rooms watching television.

The question is what can be done about this kind of thing?  It is very hard to say no to people who want to see you, and even harder to say no when they are dependent on you to make sure that the elderly, infirm and indigent members of your extended family can make it at all.   So there is no choice but to sacrifice one’s own goals and to do so with as much grace as it is possible to muster.

The key thing is that you shouldn’t allow resentment to fester.  They have a perfect right to your time - it is all part of the package of being a human.

My strategy has been to be slightly detached and to do what I can to do some of the stuff I want to do in my head.  It turns out that the conversation can proceed quite well even if I make only a minor contribution to it, and that nobody is too put out if they don’t hear what I am up to.

There is also a lot to be said for being forced to leave what you are doing aside for a period and to come back to it with fresh eyes.  So I made a point of completely closing down my office and even moving the furniture for a really thorough bit of hoovering.  So although I haven’t had the holiday I wanted to have, I have had a holiday and hopefully it will do me some good.

Oh, and if you are interested everyone is doing fine.


photo credit: Family Group/Wedding via photopin (license)